A rent in the fabric of my mind
The rip edged in neon blue layered with black
Nothing is here
No ideas
No memories
Nothing
Clearness
Perfect clarity
The nothing is so clear it glows
The silver flute speaks so sweetly and whispery
Brilliant flashes in the sheen
Tickling my earchords
I am played by a lover
I see
Down
Spread before me
Horizon of luminosity
Black blanketing above and around
Looking down at an angle
Open my heart
Slide out my legs
through my feet
into the totality.
Here.
Suspended.
No self, no body.
Some awareness.
I am the entirety of it.
So immensely vast.
Coming down moving toward the body
She’s lying there, so perfectly ready
Unzip the long zipper down the front of her black latex body suit.
As I slide into it, returning
The brilliancy is here
Right at the threshold…
In a silent explosion
Now a neon green glow suit,
No longer plain latex.
I am the light here.
A glow cloak.
It’s all within me, halographically
Is me, is my consciousness.
IT IS ALL HERE.
Does it go on forever?
Leaving the Light 12x24 Nov 2013
Indistinct silhouettes milling about
Having left the light through a blue door
Idling in a world of bright colors and distractions
We become individuals then forget
Slowly over time,
crafting thick wooden beams of support
Fashioning a suitable eye
Seeing only the shapes and colors
Relinquishing the depths
Casting about in confusion
The ache propels
Then the light lovingly whispers:
Look through the spaces
Return to me
Lavender Moon Balm--July 2013 20x16
Here in the heart of my belly
There is room for balm
Strength in the softness
Love in the support
Purple and lavender, black and silver
Taking the gravity off my body in thrilling swoops
A silver fulcrum
Balance and lever both
In the soothing nourishment of this soft light
There beats an impulse toward freedom
And freedom in the impulse
Both
A wide soft deep heart
A pillow for the soul
The exquisiteness so close
Right here
Softness swells in response to the call
An arising of love
To know myself as this
Right here
How does that impact my body?
Tears, throat spacious
Settled, soft, true
Knowing it’s all okay
A knowing in my heart
A certain resilient texture tells me so
The texture of truth here in this moment
Clean, squeaky almost, a solid soft certainty
A smile lifts my mouth
As if realness is a secret I have ascertained
The elixir softly sweet, a drop from a honeysuckle blossom
Delicate and pure, recognizable deep in my soul
Sliding down my throat
Melting it into only the barest essence of sweetness
An unending space within
Permeated by this solitary drop
What does the drop do to my structures?
Melting the coating around my heart
Melting the cotton batting that cloaks my nakedness
And buffers my vulnerabilities
So that I may feel the coolness blowing through
Reveling in the fresh touch along my clavicle
The unimpeded unfolding within my chest
Freedom—a droplet of clear dew—ever-expanding
Transparent Expression--July 2013 16x20
A Vivid Blue Abyss--16x20 August 2011
Standing, forlorn on the edge of a cliff
Frightened and alone
Buffeted by strong chill winds
The eerie blue stretching out endlessly below
The jagged black bulk thrusts upward
A seemingly insurmountable pile
Deeply rooted in obscurities and delusions
An exhausting climb up through the jumble
And then a leap of trust into the unknown
As a silhouette of color separates from the black form
Shimmering as it rides the current toward infinity
A last glimmer as it dissolves into the blue
Something Dark Looms--30x24 June 2011
Something looms
Disguised as an umbrella, perhaps as father or mother
Has me believe I’m small and helpless
Or a separate being cut off from the world
Although I’m no longer a child
Offers me a soft sling in which to nestle
Here, let me take care of you
Swathes me in layers to protect me
And the promise of sleep to muffle any pain
So comfortable I don’t notice the bindings
As the cost of comfort
The steely wires stretching into a miasmic web
The minute anchor points riddling my body
Until I wake
And begin to sort through the ties
Something still looms
Something dark hovers near my pearling heart
Hiding there just beyond my ken
Oozing dread from just below my awareness
The tensile strength almost overwhelming
And so, what began as waltzing with god within myself
Has become a battle to free my soul from the looming dread
A battle often waged in molasses
With gaping wounds and dark holes
Through which I surrender and sink
Into the truth of myself
Haybales--10x30 June 2011
Always catching my eye
These rounds of hay
Spaced across the fields
As my car flies by
Not so much as a mark of man
But as a statement of duality
Coexisting
The shapes in my mind
And the flow of endlessness
This point of awareness
Amid the field of infinity
This drop of water
In the sea
What compels this body?
The eye etchings
And colors, shapes dazzling
Flashes of brilliant vividness
The flood of stillness
Concentrated serenity flowing down
Impetus of the creative process
Manifesting on the screen of my mind
Chest expanding to hold the universe of possibilities
Eye movement tapping into them
Flashes of brilliant vividness
As a blue jewel pierces my forehead
Able to perceive the interwoven field
Emanating from my inner nature
The delicate beauty
Revealed from its cocoon
The preciousness I am
Spreading forth
Interwoven with strength and confidence
Interlaced with nothingness
Flashes of brilliant vividness
As a blue jewel pierces my eye
Morning by the Creek No. 2 --30x24 March 2011
The slant of early light
Strikes a chord in me
So that I feel the thrum of it
In my inner ear
Tickling my tympanic membrane
Wake up, beloved, wake up
Feather light
Stretch languorously
Surrounded in warmth
Watching the mists clear away
Revealing me
In the golden light
Early--16x20 Feb 2011
There is a place in my heart
Quiet lies gently there
The glow soft
As serenity in the coming light
There is a place in my soul
Kindness resides in the mist
Spreading over the ground
A soothing flow
There is a place in my mind
Where all the subtleties hide
Emerging as the mist lifts
Giving me courage to explore
There is a place in my body
Overflowing with love and appreciation
Spilling out to kiss each cheek
With butterflies
There is a place in my life
Welcome
Staring down into a chasm
Filled with my deepest inadequacies
and all the uncertainties of the world
So scared of falling
and ceasing to exist
Yet so willing to leap
I suddenly realize
There is no place to fall
There is no place to fall because
I am both the ground and the fall
Dance of the Silver Filigree--June 2013 12x6
White vastness stretches wide within me
Absorbing everything
Expressing it all in the form of ground
White ground that holds infinity in its melting distinction
And across this I dance
A multitude of faces
Fashioned of shiny, eradiating silver
Facets created at joints and runs
The filigree delicately wrought
Yet exceptionally strong
And effortlessly tensile
There is nothing I need do
Except dance
Dance as the wellspring of form
Infinitude Suspended--June 2013 22x18
An infinitesimally still infinitude
Extending for millions of eons
Beyond any reach of mind or measure
Suspended here
Consciousness not localized
Infinitude suspended
A seemingly impenetrable mystery
That I can explore just by being the exploration
Infinitude suspended
Motionless
Looking back at casey
Through her own eyes
She’s infinitely beautiful
All the qualities of a heart at home
Burst in
Permeating the infinitude
With golden light, warmth, and love
Boundless love
The warmth becomes imbued with certainty
Sliding back into infinitude
Consciousness knowing itself
Recognizing the unfolding casey
As itself
Casey knowing herself
As it
Beneath
the golden pearl lies the mystery.
The secrets revealed… hand in hand
aka The Door to Endlessness
Amid the structures of my mind
The blackness reveals a wonderful mystery
You can find the door to endlessness
Amid the structures in my mind
Dissolving
Supported by columns of white
An interlace of branches allow
the burgeoning flow
Trees of being dance joyfully here
In my mind
Footsteps fading until nothing remains...
A Fine Morning--April 2013 12x24
Dapples trace the surface
Entrancing, lovely pools
Early sun penetrates the canopy
Shimmering play of light
Silhouettes dark against the water
There, with no doubt
Chiaroscuro pointing to the interplay
Along the path
So, abide here a bit
Before moving along the shore
Rest here a while
As yourself
aka Mobius
Suspended in warmth
A gentle, fluid flow
Amid the full spaciousness
Me, present as being
Being in a hot-tub
Nothing in my experience
Floating, simply me floating
The cool wind caressing my skin
Whispering to my cells
The inky blue vastness surrounds me
The silhouette of the mountain embraces me
A single planet
In a perfect trajectory from my eye
Floating, being, spacious, calm, content
Arising
Smooth, silvery upthrust
Hot-tub Inquiry--28x22 June 2012
Coalescing in my heart
An intensity, a density
At the exact pinpoint
Between my breasts
Density condensing
A collapse of the entirety
Into a singularity
Of unimaginable density
Excruciating
The sky, the mountain, the water, the planet
All converge into me
The very center of me
Such that I am the mountain
I am the sky
All this
Here as my heart
Yes, a truth-dense core
A magnetic reminder of who I am
Here now
The color of a cat’s eye
The images vivid in this inner view
Swirling up amid the blue
Up
I sense the layers
Accruing over time
One over another
Each surrounding a tiny kernel of truth
The nacre of falseness
A false pearl
And so these appear as I work
Arising from my unconscious
One by one
Each now a lovely gift
The depths to plumb
Sorting false from true
Like bubbles bursting
Finally nuggets rest clear
Exactly where I am
Beguiling Deception--20x16 May 2012
Deconstruction 24x18 Oct 2011
The shell of an empty room
Shuttered against intrusion
Beams holding the walls tight
Thinking, this is who I am
Until, through broken lines
Consciousness arises
Melting upward
Brilliant in the night
The stars a sweeping backdrop
To a soul emerging
Flying free, arms widespread
In the deep blue sky